Fancy Face

Ever watch Days of our Lives?

My sisters and I did ALL THE TIME growing up. When my mom stayed home with us she would always watch Days while she did her excercises, and while we napped. How do I know? Because I would sneak my way to the stairs and watch for a little bit until I got bored. At some point we must have thought it was interesting; we would watch it after school. Now it is on at lunch time and I catch it maybe once a year. Anyway, on that show there is a woman named Hope. Her husband calls her Fancy Face. Cute.

My little Hope turned two this week. She also gave up her pacifier. We are anxious to move her into her toddler bed too, but we will wait until she learns to sleep without her pacie. As I type this, I am listening to her do everything but sleep during her nap time. She has always been such a great sleeper--never fusses, and sleeps for a long time. Well, that story is changing, understandably, since we said goodbye to her pacie last night. I'm so prayerful that her wonderful sleep habits will return.

I had a mini-crisis last night. Like I said, we took the pacie away. I wasn't sure how to do it, but I had heard of a couple of different ways that worked for other people. We decided to tell her that she's a big girl now and that she can say goodbye to her pacie...big girls don't use pacies. She wanted nothing to do with being a big girl. So, then we showed her the pacie that was "broken". She cried and cried, all the way to the trash can where she obediently threw it away. My heart hurt so bad as I watched her being such a good girl to throw it away, but so so sad as she did it. It was like we were taking away her best friend. I immediately felt like I had done everything wrong. "I didn't do it right! She isn't supposed to cry this hard." is what I was thinking. For the next two hours she kept saying, "Pacie is broken! Throw in the trash!" through sobs. Oh, the tears that pull on my heartstrings! It's all a part of the process, but it was hard. She tired herself out and eventually fell asleep. She slept through the whole night, which we weren't expecting. She went shopping with me today (which was a scary drive! First winter weathery mix of precipitation. We should have just stayed home...good reminder for the upcoming months), and was such a good girl at the store. She is an incredible little girl. I'm so glad God gave her to this family. She got a little treat for being a big girl, but still every time we say Hope is a big girl, she cries, "No!". Someone should tell her it's not so bad.

So, it's looking like she'll skip her nap today, which might make tonight a little bit easier.

Thus ends my story of when Hope said goodbye to her first best friend. So long, Hawkeye pacie.

Baby Liv

We are enjoying a smiley, joyful, mellow, happy, and tender baby here at our house.

Her name is Olivia Faith. Olivia because it has connections to an olive branch, which means peace. The Lord brought me great peace while He was forming her, so it is appropriate. Also, Olivia is often shortened to Liv, so we kinda thought it would be a great reminder for her to live her faith...Olivia Faith. So, now we have our Grace, Hope, and Faith.

The other day someone was talking about how pretty the name Grace is. She didn't know about our baby Grace, not many new-found friends do. I kinda wanted to say, "It is so pretty, and that's why we chose it...", but like I do so often when it comes to this, I refrained.

Some pictures of our incredible reminder of God's miracles.

She is a unique creation with her sensitivity, love of cuddles, and quickness to giggle and smile.

She is an image of her sister with her good sleep habits, and easy-going personality.

Savoring the days

Getting ready for a walk!

Olivia loves to be held; she will not sleep without it!

Creatively trying to capture a tear-provoking moment. Thank you God for a baby to hold.

Olivia looking big.

Sisters.

Hope's picture face.

I was taking a picture of how Olivia's feet fill out her jammies now. Gotta love baby feet. Also in this picture is my new iPod, photo booth pictures from the wedding we went to on Saturday night, and the color swatch for the new color in my bathroom.

I was reminded today on three separate occasions by three separate people that I need to savor these days.

One father of four told me about his oldest son who turned 16 this week. He now has his license and is running errands for the family. He said it seemed like just yesterday he and his wife were moving to Sioux City with a one-year-old boy in the front seat between them. He said, "The time just went like *that." (finger snap) Wow, the sincerity and thoughtfulness in his voice called me to stop and thank God for these days.

One father told me about his daughter who just turned 24. I had never met him, but he felt compelled to tell me how quickly the time goes after he observed Hope fingering every little gum and candy package while we were waiting to pay for our pizza at Caseys. He said, "I remember those days. My daughter was a petite little toddler like yours. The time goes by so fast." Again, there was such a thoughtfulness in his voice. It was like I was in a passenger car in his brain, witnessing every minute of joy and love...it all came spilling out as he spoke to me. He never told me any specific memories, but I could see them. As Hope and I walked home from Caseys hand-in-hand I felt so special and honored to be her mommy. I get to be there for every moment. I get to be the one she cries with, and learns with, and laughs with, feels most comfortable with, and someday, gets sick with. That's right, she has yet to be 'throw-up' sick, thank goodness. At that moment I also felt like I was a part of a club, the parent club. Now that Hope is older, and strangely, now that I have two babies, I feel more strongly the honor of parenthood. I realize the calling that it is, to a certain degree. I know there will be so much more to experience.

Finally a friend of mine (@jdzwief) put it really well: "These are some good times. So take a good look around. You may not know it now, but you're gonna miss this." That's what I thought today as I walked with Hope, and as I watched her play with her daddy, and even when both of my babies were crying at the same time. I thought, "Some day I'm going to miss this." And now I know from relayed experience, that day will come more quickly than I care for it to. Thanks, God, for these days and nights that have been prepared for me. My prayer is to handle them with grace and goodness and intentionality.

The Vertical Version Week 2

A few pictures from our week+half since bedrest. I like being out during our mornings right now. It may be a while until I can have the freedom to do that so easily. Hope is lots of fun, and such a good girl.

We've played at the SC Art Center, the mall, the cemetery, Little Sioux Park, Moville park, our house and yard. We decided last week that if we were still without a baby girl by May 20-22, then we would head over to Orange City for some Tulip Festival fun. Looks like we'll be doing some traveling. Hopefully the weather will be nice.

I'm thankful for this time, but I'm also ready to meet our little lady. I'm sleeping well and feeling well, but boy, sometimes it's hard to get from point A to point B, literally.....aches and pains!

Hanging in there!

The Vertical Version

I'm full-time vertical now.

It feels really good.
I'm enjoying performing the normal tasks of being a mommy.

Here is how my week has been...first week off of bedrest:

MONDAY: Successful procedure reversal at the doctor's office. I was really thankful to have Grandma Demarest along to take care of Hope because I ended up staying at the office for a long time! They again noticed a low heart rate, so we monitored for about an hour to see if we could establish a base line. They were a little concerned when her heart rate continued to fluctuate. Then my doctor was consulted and she said it was fine. When I see her next week, I'm going to ask her why it is that this little one has a heart rate that tends to be fast, then slow, then fast, then slow...

TUESDAY: Full day at home alone with Hope. First time that has happened since February! I posted some pictures from our day--it was almost 100 degrees that day. We went on a walk and swam, all before 10 am. After that it was just too hot. I was really sore and tired by the end of this day. Hope is wearing a hat in the stroller picture above. She picked it out and didn't want to take it off. Cute.

WEDNESDAY: I was excited to attend the last BSF meeting for the year. I had started going to this Bible study back in the fall, but have been gone for 10 weeks. My small group has been faithfully praying for our family, and provided some good food for us. I was anxious to thank them in person, and to take Hope to play with the nursery ladies for the last time. Well, we got there at 9am, and there was no childcare. I decided to take Hope to Target for an hour, then we came back to hopefully catch the ladies upon their dismissal from large group testimony time. They found me, and we were all really happy to praise God for how far I had made it. It was really fun to walk around Target with Hope...I wasn't inconvenienced.

Wednesday night was our last Jr. High meeting at church. Luke and I volunteer with the middle schoolers. It was a really bittersweet night. I was so happy to be able to come back and see my girls that I have been investing in for three years now. I've always felt a deep care and concern for them over the years, but haven't always been able to be there with them full-time. They've seen me through three months of bedrest total, and one month of maternity leave. So, my heart was overjoyed to celebrate our time together, but also sad that I had missed out on large portions of time with them. Three of my girls were former students of mine. It was especially fun to get to continue a relationship with them through Jr. High church fellowship. I'm happy to know that most of them will be continuing in high school ministry next year, and that I'll see them at church.

THURSDAY: Well, that's today. We are having a good day. Tonight Luke and I will leave Hope with Grandma while we go to the hospital to take a free class.

My prediction for May 30 still stands, and Luke's for May 16 does too. He has to be out of town for work on the 16th, so I'm hoping he's not right. As of Monday I was dilated to 2cm. I've felt more contractions this week, but nothing regular, so I can't say that anything will happen soon. We'll see.

Praising God for His help!

Bedrest Blogs Week 10

Week 10?!?!?!
Week 10????!!!

Wow, we made it.
I cried a little on Feb. 27, at 26 weeks, when I realized I had 10 weeks of bedrest ahead of me. My mind was racing thinking about what we would do with Hope, how we would eat every day, and how Luke would manage being mom AND dad in many respects. I honestly disliked the thought of being so dependent on others, and that I would need to talk to people a lot more. Ha! That sounds bad, but it's true.

It's been hard to not be as active in Hope's life. It's just been plain hard, but I made a conscious decision to not speak poorly of bedrest. I hope I succeeded most of the time.

Bedrest was God's provision for us; our road to sustaining this pregnancy, and I was thankful for it. I practiced my faith throughout bedrest. I read this today about faith: "Faith does not say, 'I see this is good for me; therefore God must have sent it.' Instead, faith declares, 'God sent it; therefore it must be good for me." That is how I tried to view bedrest...OK God, here we go, thank you for your goodness and help.

"When I said, 'My foot is slipping,' your love, O Lord, supported me. When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought joy to my soul."

Psalm 94: 18-19

But we have made it!
Praise the Lord!

"Come, let us sing for joy to the Lord;

let us shout aloud to the Rock of our salvation.

Let us come before him with thanksgiving and extol him with music and song.

For the Lord is the great God,

the great King above all gods...

Come, let us bow down in worship,

let us kneel before the Lord our Maker;

for he is our God and we are the people of his pasture,

the flock under his care."

Psalm 95: 1-3, 6-7

So, today, Cinco de Mayo, we are 36 weeks along.
Little baby girl can come anytime.
On Monday, May 9 at 10am, I have an appt. to reverse the procedure I had done in December. After that is done, I can walk, drive, pick up Hope, prepare all meals, clean, do whatever I need to do. I will be incredibly tired and sore for a while, but it will be good to hopefully build up some muscle again before labor/delivery.

Luke told me last night his guess for a delivery date is May 16. That is one week after bedrest is over. It is also Hope's half birthday. My guess is May 30. I think it will take a little longer.
I need to pack a hospital bag, narrow our name list, pick out clothes for our baby to wear home, get a bag ready for Hope, and rearrange my 'bedrest room'.

Dr. appt. : This week's appt. was routine. Things are going well. Wonderful!

Best: My last full day of bedrest will be Saturday! It will be hard for me to stay down that day. I was given premission to go to church and have lunch out on Sunday for Mother's Day. We will probably also do some grocery shopping since our fridge is empty, and we want to have dinner options in case the baby comes swiftly.

Worst: Nope.

We're so thankful for your prayers and support and help!

Bedrest Bright Spot

I think this little beauty looks just like Hope.

We continue to try to find a suitable name for baby #3. We have many ideas. It is our custom in life as a Demarest family to make decisions at the final minute. There has been much talk and debate, but we will hold off on the final decision until we can hold her, most likely.

As is apparent, today we had an ultrasound to check the baby's kidneys. This has been an on-going issue with our wee one. She has had some extra fluid in her kidneys indicating a problem with draining. Today we saw that one of her kidneys is measuring perfectly, but the other one is still a little large. Our doctor said we need to let our pediatrician know after she is born, and within a week they will do an ultrasound to check the size again. If it continues to be a problem there will be a surgical procedure when she is 4 or 5 years old. 499 times out of 500 the issue resolves itself. We are thankful for her wonderful health otherwise, and the fact that this complication is no worse.

We found out she is 5.6 pounds right now. She is no longer breech. So great to be able to see her.

Bedrest Blogs Week 9

Today I am enjoying some pictures from our fabulous Easter weekend. The Roushes, Demarests, and Smiths were together for food, games, and fun. We have some funny memories to connect us, as now we will have many, many miles in between us.

Last weekend was especially fun for me. I was able to attend the church Easter egg hunt, which was very similar to locusts devouring a corn field. I also had lunch at Buffalo Wild Wings with the Roushes, and Amanda pushed me around in a wheel chair at Target. The Target experience might have been my favorite. I loved that time with Amanda. She is a fun shopping partner. I got some newborn-sized diapers, and some too-cute-to-pass-up outfits for Hope and the new baby.

The next day I went to church. It was great to share that part of my world with so much of my family.

What a great weekend! I wasn't able to host exactly like I wanted to, but my mind was at ease knowing that they were there to just be with us, and didn't mind having to get their own food and towels.

So today we are 35 weeks along!

Whew!

It could be argued that at this point it would be fine for me to get up and going. I have reservations though, because of the surgical procedure I had done back in December. All threat of malfunction with that will be nonexistent on May 9, so until then I will behave. The Debrest countdown stands at 10 days!! Woo hoo!

Today I had my last P17 injection. 20 out of 20 shots under my belt feels good! Basically that shot is to hold off labor. Glad to say that they have been doing their job.

I just want to say, I didn't think I'd make it this far. I honestly was never fearful; I had a confidence that this baby would be ok, but I had doubts about how long she would actually wait to come into this world. To now be at the end of April feels amazing. All credit and glory to God who has sustained us and cared for us in our time of need!

Dr appt. this week: Even after a very eventful and active weekend for me, pregnancy conditions are great. There was no change. God is good.

Best: Family fun. Hilarious company and fun at the church Easter egg hunt, Target, eating out, watching Inception, Liz and Andy deep clean the house, fun interactions with Hope, and 10 DAYS LEFT!

Looking forward to watching the wedding of William and Kate tomorrow morning! Also tomorrow morning: an ultrasound in Sioux City to look at the baby's kindneys again. It will be good to see our little girl, and to check her progress.

Worst: Liz and Andy, Judah and Asher are gone. Come back!

Bedrest Blogs Week 8

Hope and Judah seize the opportunity to sit in my chair while I am away. They were probably watching Sesame Street.

This week I've had a case of the 'sick-of's'. As in, "I'm sick of this, and I'm sick of that". So, it's been an emotionally low week at times, but I really do prefer it this way, given my options. I'm hoping for an ending date of May 9, then possibly a family weekend on May 13-15. It would be fun to do something together that weekend, not too far from home though...just in case.

I think I can...I think I can...I think I can...

Dr. appt.: Everything went really well this week. Steady as she goes. The doctor gave me the ok to take a chair to our church's Easter egg hunt, and Easter service this weekend. Saturday morning is the hunt. I'm excited to see Hope and her cousins out and about hunting for eggs. If Saturday's activity goes well, then I'll probably feel comfortable going to church Sunday morning. Nice to be able to get out and do something! I'm kinda concerned about what to wear though. ha! What even fits anymore? I don't know.

Best: Still so thankful for the incredible help from family and friends. Liz and I had a slumber party (with kids) last weekend while the guys were doing fun guy stuff. We watched a movie and made puppy chow, just like old times. We missed our sisters though. We're looking forward to this Easter weekend. The Roushes are coming to visit!!!!!!! and more of this: !!!!!! Pumped!

Worst: Sometimes I get frustrated because I have no idea what's going on in my own house. I can't stay on top of things like I want to. Like, what happened to our Aladdin movie??? I snuck a look at our movies, and was really flustered when I couldn't find our copy of Aladdin. What happened??? That particular shelf looked more empty than it should be. Yes, I know how full the shelf should be. It's still bothering me. I blame it on two months of bedrest.

Bedrest Blogs Week 7

Play-time pictures with Daddy. Hope is immitating everything Luke does. It is pretty cute. As seen here, she joined Daddy's rest time on the floor. She's also enjoyed giving hugs and kisses in the last month. What a joy she is!

33 Weeks today!

Bedrest this week has been very steady. It's been a great week. I've felt about two contractions the whole week (very normal at this stage), and the baby has been kicking and moving a lot. I'm starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. About three weeks left...what a blessing! Thank you all for your prayers and help. God is good, and we are really enjoying considering how the Lord might use us to bless the lives of others as we have been blessed.

Dr. appt.: This week's appt. brings nothing new to report. I was happy this week to be able to give God credit while talking to my doctor, and she agreed so genuinely. I want her to know the reason for our hope, mostly because she is so close to the situation, and she sees our reactions. God sees our reactions too, so how wonderful to be able to honor Him by giving Him the credit.

Best: One week closer to the end! Great time with family this week! We all celebrated our nephew's 2nd birthday last Friday night. We pray with Liz and Andy for Judah's health since then; he has caught bronchitis. Also, Hope has been so much fun this week. She really loves her Mommy and Daddy, but especially loves to laugh and play with Daddy. That is a joy to see. This week Liz helped me pull out the little baby clothes. I loved seeing them!

Worst: I really wanted to do some spring cleaning this weekend. Guess it will have to wait. Oh well.

Bedrest Blogs Week 6

Snack Time!

Judah is watching PBS, Hope is watching Judah. This might be the time she was on her last bite, and was watching to see if Judah was going to finish his. Oh, Hope.

32 WEEKS!

Big milestone. We're happy to be here.

This was the first week of having Liz, Judah, and Asher here to play with and talk to. It has been so good and fun. Liz sure is busy, and I truly appreciate her attitude of service. We hardly hear a peep out of Asher, but we really enjoy watching him and talking to him. It is really cute to watch Judah and Hope 'talk' to each other and play, all the while learning about sharing and adjusting to a new 'normal'.

Dr. appt.: This week I was sure my doctor was going to tell me to head to the hospital after my appt. I had been feeling an increase in contractions over the weekend, and was pretty concerned. She was satisfied with how things looked, and was not so worried. So, we're thankful for that. Believe it or not I've been doing even more to stay down this week since I've continued to dislike the amount of contractions. I've been eating many meals without going to the table, and I have stopped changing Hope's diapers and clothes.

Best: Beautiful weather this week!! We've had windows and doors open, and it cheers me right up. Another best: Time with the Smiths! Also, we had a visit from Debra this weekend! It was the first perfect day of spring. We watched out the window as someone moved out of a house, and watched as a lady lost her dog. Yes, we were all "Rear Window" on Saturday. We also watched a baby eagle. What fun Saturday was! Hope had a great time playing outside with Daddy too! She loves her some fresh air and running room. I'm glad b/c she also loves her some Goldfish snack crackers. :) My wonderful friend Stacy K came to visit on Saturday too. Wow, how fun to talk and talk and talk and catch up. I told her about following Jeff Probst on Twitter, and she forgot to tell me about India. :( Last Saturday can feel free to repeat itself over and over.

Worst: Can't complain! We're still here, and the baby's still growing; we are blessed.

Bedrest Blogs Week 5

This is Hope playing in a laundry basket at a friend's house. Last night I was also trying to capture Hope's first little ponytail. Hope makes a funny face, then she tries to get on her car while shedding her overalls. She's getting so big, and she's lots of fun!!!

So, week 5...

Dr. Appt.: Not much to report here. Everything is steady, and we decided I should stay on bedrest until approx. the first week in May. My doctor is so pumped to meet my sister, Liz, and Liz's boys. So, Liz, you have to come to an appt. with me while you are here for all of April. This doctor of mine is pretty cool. She contacted us after Grace was born, and showed us a lot of care during that time. We had many talks about our story, Liz's story, and where to go from there. So glad to have her along on our journey.

Best:

• Steady days! So thankful for that! 31 weeks today.


• I've also had a visit from my neighbor who came to 'chew the fat'. We discussed baby's gender, news from the neighbors, and home improvement projects.


• I've also seen some friends from church this week...I'm convinced it is helping this time go faster.


• Liz and Andy, Judah and Asher are on their way to Sioux City as we speak!! They will park in Sioux City sometime today, and we will see them tomorrow night for dinner probably. Liz will start 'bedrest duty' next week on Tuesday. We're thankful for their safe travels, as pulling your home all those miles can be an anxious thing.


• Monster Cookie Ice Cream.

Worst: This week I've had a tired spell, and also a very hungry spell. Not really that bad. Maybe an adequate 'worst'' would be that it's not warm enough to open the windows yet. We'll get there very soon, I suspect.

I've had a few people comment on my good attitude with all of this. That makes me happy that what is shining through is an attitude of grace and acceptance. My earnest hope and prayer in life is that an attitude of grace and acceptance would shine through in my friendships, parenting, ministry, and marriage. A few of these days I've struggled with contentment, and with sharing Hope, and with not being able to just do things for myself. But for the most part, it's easy for me to just not think about the situation, and just enjoy the show I'm watching, or the game I'm playing, or the book I'm reading, or the conversation I'm having. I'll tell you the truth though, about when it's hardest. It's hardest when I can't do what I want to with Hope. *sigh* That will come. I'm patient because it is so worth it.

**Can't wait to meet you, sweet baby girl on the way!**

Bedrest Blogs Week 4

30 weeks today!
One month of bedrest down, 1.5 to go.

Best: Grammie and Papa Rick came to visit this week. Papa didn't stay very long, but for the short time that he was here, he got to hold Hope for the first time since she was born. She has been a little fearful of him, but this time we put raisins in his hands, and before she knew what she was doing, she was enjoying her 'drink and treat' with Papa. (Drink and Treat=nourishment just before bed. Usually it consists of only milk.)

While my mom was here, we caught up. She also cleaned, played with Hope, and made sure there was food on the table three times a day. Her favorite things to do while she was here: give Hope baths, go on walks with Hope, watch/talk to/play with Hope. I'm really glad Mom had such a great time with Hope, and me. Sad to see her go today!

More best: My sister Liz, and her family are coming next week for the whole month of April. Awesome! She will help us a few days a week. I'm so excited to spend more time with them all!

Dr. appt: Really great visit this week! Things are no worse. The doctor did say that from her observations, things seem a little bit better every week...the power of our God, and our prayers! We continue to pray for the babies kidneys, that the baby would no longer be breech, and at least 6 more weeks of pregnancy.

Worst: ....uhhh....

Bedrest Blogs Week 3

Celebrating today the little life that is growing and developing in week 29. I'm trying not to get so focused on the pregnancy and what is or isn't going on, so that I forget about the end result.

There's a baby on the way!

A new little girly who will bring us joy, and teach us so much.

What will her name be?

What will she look like?

Will she be a lot like Hope, or totally different?

What will her personality be like?

It's exciting, I'm excited, we're all excited.

Dr. appt.:

• Monday's Dr. appt. brought some great news. I passed the glucola test, so no gestational diabetes this time around. This is a blessing in many ways, especially because we have many meals coming in the house. When I saw the Dr. it went very quickly and she didn't say much more than, "Things look good!" Meaning, things are steady, and not much different than last week. So, bedrest is working, and there's still a need to be very careful.
• This week we also had an ultrasound at the hospital to check up on the baby's kidneys. Her kidneys are retaining some fluid still, which means they aren't draining properly, so we're going to check them again in six weeks. This next appt. will tell us if we need to focus on her kidneys after she is born. I suppose time will tell if she will require a kidney surgery after delivery to make sure all the plumbing issues are worked out. We're praying for God's special touch to remove this issue.

Best: This has been a really good week. I've had great company, very little contraction activity, and the weather has been great. Yesterday I was able to get out and enjoy it since I had the ultrasound appt. We needed to kill some time in the city after the appt. (waiting until 5 so we could receive a wonderful dinner from a church friend). So while we were killing time, we found a cute little park downtown with a bench for me and playground equipment for Hope and Luke. Hope walked around on the basketball court, but when she came to the drop-off into the grass, she would say 'whoa!' and would not go any further. Luke had to coax her, and she finally braved the green stuff (or brown-ish, green stuff). So, since we had that brief outdoor time, I got to witness Hope's first park experience with swings, slides, walking, reaching, hanging, laughing and dancing. *Sheesh, can't believe I forgot my camera.

Another best: all the wonderful meals, and miscellaneous generosity. We are incredibly thankful, and don't really know how to express our thanks.

Worst: Pregnancy rash. Yes, rash. It's not contagious, nor due to bedrest or hygiene practices. It's solely pregnancy hormones. Red, itchy, everywhere. The Dr. suggested hydrocortizone, but as far as I've read, it will be something that lasts until after delivery. Oh well.

We're hanging in there! And we're very thankful for every day.

Psalm 42:8

The Lord will command His lovingkindness in the daytime; and His song will be with me in the night, a prayer to the God of my life.

Psalm 17:9

Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body also will rest secure

Psalm 28:7

The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in Him and I am helped.

Psalm 62:5&8

Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him.

Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge.

"Our burdens are our wings; on them we soar to higher realms of grace; without them we must ever roam on plains of undeveloped faith, (For faith grows but by exercise in circumstance impossible).

--Streams in the Desert, March 9

Bedrest bafflement

This is what I see out my window all day long. Why, oh, why is my neighbor still parking on the lawn? The snow is gone, sir. (OK, most of the snow...there is still a random patch clearly visible in the picture.) There is no more need to worry about snow plows. Please, move it for me.

Bedrest Bright Spot

I PASSED!!!

Today I had to take a glucola test at my Dr. appt. It's when you drink a really sugary drink and an hour later they check your blood sugar levels. If the number they measure is above 129, you have to go do a three hour test at the hospital to see if you have gestational diabetes. When I was pregnant with Hope I failed every glucola test, so I had to manage my diabetes with my diet.

Well, not this time! I couldn't believe it when the nurse told me I passed. My number was 124, so very close, but not close enough!

This made me soooo happy. How great to not have to worry about this too. I thanked God, because I think this is a gift from Him.

Do you know what this means??? This means I can partake of the yummy ice cream that was delivered to our house this weekend. In moderation of course.

I want to take this opportunity to address the cause of gestational diabetes. I feel like there are a lot of misconceptions. I don't know everything exactly, which makes me really hesitant to bring it up, but I've heard it from the doctor's mouth, so I feel compelled.

A) Raise your hand if you think eating lots of sweets during pregnancy will give you gest. diab. ....anyone?

B) Now raise your hand if you think pregnancy hormones make it hard for insulin to interact with glucose, thereby making your blood sugar too high! ....anyone?

B is true. So the important thing here....when a mommy has gestational diabetes, it's not her fault, friends. Blame it on the hormones.

OK, bring on the objections, you fellow know-it-alls!

Bedrest Bright Spot

28 weeks!

This is a wonderful milestone! This is one of those points the doctors and hospitals are anxious for a mommy to get to. So thankful we've made it!

Looking forward to our next milestone: week 32!!

But, one day at a time, right? :)

Bedrest Blogs Week 2

I'm like my cats. I lay down. I get up to use the 'litter box' and 'eat out of the food bowl'. Then I lay down again for 4 hours in a row. When someone enters the house that I think will listen, I 'meow' and demand my needs to be met. (My demands are a little more politely given.) There are a few differences between us:
1. The cats go outside sometimes during the day/night for hours where they meet and play with other cats...the other day Han came back into the house with a puffy tail--uh, oh, Han was being a bully again.
2. After laying around all day, the cats will allow themselves 45 minutes where they chase each other up and down the stairs, up and down the hall, around the kitchen (knocking down the garbage can, jumping on the fridge, and if they're naughty they will jump on the counters--this is when I wish I could smack them and get out my cleaner), and all the while avoiding the 16-month-old who likes to talk to them and chase them. I don't get to do that kind of running and playing.
3. The cats get to go downstairs.
4. The cats lay all over other living things...me. Even after being told to go lay somewhere else, they will return 5 minutes later. I lay on a large chair.
5. When I know there is no one that will listen to my requests, I don't ask. My cats still ask me to feed them and let them outside even though I'm pretty sure they realize I move for no one.

Maybe it's ok to have their company. However, in a few weeks they will start shedding all over me...I'm not ok with that.

Dr. appt. update: I got to see my regular doctor again this week for the first time in a month. She was concerned with the condition of different aspects. She said the stitch I had put in isn't doing anything for me anymore. Sounds like things are just pretty weak, and I think both of us each time are just hoping for one more week until we get to see each other again for a normal appt. I'm still dialated to 1cm., and if the baby were to be positioned the right way we would see some alarming ultrasounds probably. My heart was heavy when I left her office on Monday, but I decided that we take it one day at a time, and we do what we can to stay inactive, and we know the One who really is holding this pregnancy together, so I can put my faith in trust in Him to help us get from week to week, and to sustain this pregnancy...we are operating on His timeline. I've felt some stronger contractions this week, but only 4-5/day.

Best: Got to go through some magazines and books that I've been meaning to get through for a while now. We also got to host small group on Monday, and I appreciated the company and fun.

Worst: Figuring out how to parent Hope from a chair. This week has been better, although Monday she was very whiney. I thought, "What happened to my sweet girl?" She's discovering her voice, words, will, and legs that carry her far from me. I want to train her to listen and obey and use her words or sign language to ask for what she wants, but it's oh-so-different and harder when on bedrest. My honest concern: will she develop undesireable habits and behaviors during these 10 weeks that will take me forever to reverse? Time will tell, and I'm sure it will be fine. I'll talk to Liz about this because she can relate, I'm sure.
Allow me to convey another worst: Luke is so busy. He loves his down time, as do we all. I'm aware of how much 'to-do' he can handle on his list, and it makes me feel sad to see that list get full. We are both doing our jobs right now, and it's just the way it needs to be. It won't be long now. We can do anything for a few months. We really are managing, and we're not suffering, it's just different.

Yes, I've memorized TV schedules. Yes, I've accumulated quite a stack of reading material. Yes, I've completed Sudoku books. But I enjoy most of that. So, I'm ok.

Bedrest Bright Spot

Debra came by to visit us yesterday!!!

She was perfect company for Hope and me. We had lunch, played with bracelets, talked while Hope slept, and Deb was even kind enough to clean for me! It brightens my day to go to the kitchen for lunch and see a clean floor, clean table, and clean counters. Seriously. But I'm not mad when it's not...just sayin'.

Debra brought us sweets!

She brought us foooood!

Thanks, Deb!!!

I have no picture of our time together, so I'll show you what Hope has been doing lately.

Thursday's Bedrest Blogs

Thursday is an easy day for me to find time to write down a few thoughts. Should I give you an idea of our new normal?
Monday: Dr. appt. days. Grandma Jo comes over for the whole day. She gets Hope out of bed while Luke and I are getting cleaned up. Hope sits down for breakfast, and I join her shortly. Grandma prepares and cleans up breakfast. Then we play. I sit/lounge. Hope talks and walks. Grandma plays and helps with dishes or laundry. Grandma makes us lunch, and somewhere in the day Hope takes 1-2 naps. At some point we go to Sioux City for a Dr. appt. Daddy gets home at 5:30. Usually on Mondays we have small group. This week we are going to try hosting it since we can't get out to go. We'll see how that goes, and if it will work to do that weekly/every other week.
Tuesday: Grandma comes again today and we have a similar day to Monday. Daddy gets home at 5:30.
Wednesday: Our friend from Moville comes to pick up Hope around 8:30. She stays there all day until Luke picks her up at 5:30. Quick time at home and then Hope and Luke are off to church for youth group. I suppose I will be reading a lot on these days.
Thursday: Grandma comes around 7am to pick up Hope. She drops her off at a friend's house from Correctionville where she plays all day. Luke picks up Hope from C-ville around 6. We have dinner and enjoy some time with Hope.
Friday: A lot like Tuesdays. Grandma cares for us, and Daddy comes home for the weekend.

AAAhhh, feels good to have a skeleton of a schedule. Everything should work out fine...until somebody gets sick or March brings us snow, but even then, we have plenty of willing helpers we can call.

We've had a friend volunteer to coordinate meals. Wow, what a blessing. There are people who have volunteered to come over and help clean, so I plan on playing it by ear in that aspect. I'll call someone up if it's been a week since the counters have been loved, not to mention the *ahem* bathroom.

We are so appreciative of the help, and also so glad that Hope can be home with me for much of the time.

I'm feeling good. We're praying for continued health for the baby; health for Hope, Luke, and me; blessings for those who are being so selfless and good to help us during this time; and God's sustaining work in our pregnancy.

Worst part so far: Not being able to pick up Hope when she looks up at me and holds out her hands.
Worst lingering effect of time in hospital: IV aftermath. After six, yes SIX, attempts at starting an IV I have been left with a numb part of my left hand. Apparently they hit a nerve, and the nurse says it will repair itself. I hope so. Ugh. It just creeps me out and gives me the willies. The only time I cried in the hospital was during the traumatizing IV experience. I have lived and learned from this one.

Well, we are patient for you, Baby girl. We hope to see you in 9+ weeks. It won't be easy, but you are worth it.

P.S. I'm tired of the cats sitting all over me already. They are tired of me pushing them away. They are tired of me not listening when they meow to get food or go outside. Man, cats just don't understand bedrest.

More later...